Nanna ~ It's only about 30 pages long now but I've been copying/pasting this story since it started!
Before anyone can say another word, the wide French-style doors are tossed open as a flamboyantly dressed man appears and flounces into the room. The first thing that comes to mind is
Just as everyone had settled comfortably into various corners of the vast room, the doors opened once again as Erik, now surrounded by Navy Seals, skipped into the room, squealing in delight like a little boy in a candy shop,"Oooooo Daddy! Look what I found in the garage! Can I keep one, huh Daddy, can I?" he coos, glancing back and forth between the stone-faced, uniformed men. None of the Seals barely even look at him in his "Urbin Lily get-up" as they assume strategic positions around the room. Erik grins and sashays over to the apparent leader, who has taken residence nearest the Godfather."You know... " he says to him, his index finger tapping against his puckered lip, "that green is just sooooo you. But that make-up stuff you got going... tsk, tsk" waving his finger in the air, "you gonna break out..., truss me." He sidles over to his sister and drapes himself over the edge of the sofa, whispering in her ear, "Don't you think he'd look divine in some Wall Street by Mustard Moon?"Edited for spelling
LMAO...this is so entertaining!
"May you always have memories to scrap!" ~ Diana
Antoinetta looks crossly over at her brother saying, "Erika, go back to your mirror before I smack you and you have Mustard Moon in your pants!"
"May you always have memories to scrap!" ~ Diana
*snortin' Mountain Dew on the screen* OMG Glo! By the way... How do you know it's Rusty?? ROFLMAO!
"Erika" stamps his foot and mopes all the way back to his bordoir (sp?).Mean while, Antoinetta turns back to Stevie the Geek with a strange look in her eyes. Stevie the Geek, I mean Steven, starts to feel a chill and the hairs rise on the back of his neck.As Steven looks for a way out of the room.....
"May you always have memories to scrap!" ~ Diana
Just as Stevie the Geek - uh, Stephen! - is looking around for an escape route the Godfather comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders and whispers , "So, Stevie boy, I understand you are quite the computer geek. Lets go talk in the other room away from these smucks." as he nods in the direction of the Seals. Antoinetta sidles over - she looks like she means business and isn't about to let Stephen out of her sight.The Navy Seals are spreading out around the room trying to cover everyone. Two of them are flipping a coin to see who has to go follow Erika and the looser drags himself away. You are more confused than ever! What is going on here? Who does Erika's hair? Just then Becky comes through the door flipping through some paperwork and says, "Godfather, What was it that you wanted me to slip into the ACOT order?" Looking up she sees Stephen and the Godfather (with Antoinetta simpering nearby) and notices Kristin. Becky is in shock - these were the last people she expected to see. Kristin turns to her and says...........
"So, Becky. I bet you didn't expect to see us here. What's the deal?"
"May you always have memories to scrap!" ~ Diana
Looking like a deer caught in the headlights, Becky stays mum. The Godfather returns to the center of the room, suddenly seeming alot more menacing (and maybe a little taller) than he did a few minutes ago. Antoinetta is now standing next to Stephen and has a firm grasp on his arm with her own."You're all here for a reason, I trust you don't think the Godfather wastes his or anybody else's time. The truth is, there is a stench in the Scrapbooking World today and I intend to deodarize it. Each person here is in the position to help me, and I expect that after all I've done for all of you, and each of you knows what that is, now that it is time to repay me for my kindnesses, you will all be willing and able to do so." The Godfather nods at one of the Navy Seals, who walks over and nudges you with his gun. You're being pushed in the direction of the Godfather, and so you walk towards him slowly, warily, glancing around the room at all the other surprised faces. Except Stephen's face, he's not so much surprised as petrified with the attentive Antoinetta breathing down his neck.You walk up to the Godfather, take his hand and plant the customary kiss on it as you've seen in the movies. "Now, then, I've spared you from the terrible Joan, the IRS, the CIA, the FBI, the Department of Homeland Security and all other manner of security departments that would love to get their hands on you. Do I have your undying devotion and loyalty? Are you up to the task at hand?" Realizing you have at last been cornered, you slowly nod, looking this man straight in the eyes to show him that although you are down, you are not yet out. "Good, that's what I thought you'd say. Now, what I need from you is..."The notebook. He's going to ask you for your notebook, and you are going to have to give it to him. Darn, this is just ridiculous, he's going to steal your prize posession, where you keep, well you know, and all because..."to teach a class at CKU-Berlin." What? Your eyes, which had wandered, are instantly fixed back on his face. "I need your answer, speak!" He says impatiently. "I'm sorry, you want me to teach a class... on what?" you ask. "Don't worry, that's all been worked out. You'll find everything you need in the classroom when you get there. It's not that important, anyway, because this isn't about your class or your skills. Think of yourself as an odor-eater, you are simply helping to freshen the air that I breathe into my nose." How flattering.The Godfather signals to Lindsay to step forward. "And you, my dear, having accepted my advice on how to word several ACOT challenges, have a special role in this plan..."
"....you, Lindsay, will take the notebook and decipher all of the notes. I want to know everything, and I want it in textbook form."
"May you always have memories to scrap!" ~ Diana
Outraged, you exclaim, "For that she'd have to find the notebook, and I'll never give it up!"The Godfather chuckles, looking at you as if you are just a child, "My dear, do you really think you can outsmart The Family? Of course we already have the notebook. And it wasn't that hard to convince your husband to give it to us, either.""I don't believe you, he may think I'm crazy but he isn't stupid." you sneer back. But your mouth crumbles as your husband walks into the room and hands the notebook, your notebook, to Lindsay. Screaming like a banchee, you start towards him only to find yourself restrained by Navy Seals. Kicking, screaming and clawing you try to fight your way free, but it's no use. "Honey, please, calm down and let me explain." your husband pleads. "They said it was the only way to cure you. It was that damn Agent Coffey, he came back to the house after you'd gone and told me they'd had you committed. He said that your notebook was the key to your psychosis. He promised that they'd be able to cure you from your scrapbooking obsession - all of it, the reckless spending on stickers and paper, the insomnia, the frantic notetaking on our family vacations, the incessant flash of the digital camera during the most important moments of our lives - he said we'd be a normal family again. He promised that that sticker store would no longer have a hold over you." That damn Agent Coffeey, you should have known he was trying too hard to get along with you. "IT'S NOT A STICKER STORE - THEY SELL MORE THAN STICKERS. DAMN YOU PEOPLE WHO MADE THEM CHANGE THEIR NAME!!!" you screech, defending your beloved ACOT yet again. A Seal covers your mouth with his hand and you viciously bite him, you're not done speaking."Please, woman, stop all that racket," the Godfather tells you as he stares you down. You stop for the moment, there will be time enough for that later. "I'm so sorry," your husband says again, "please forgive me." You know it's not really his fault, all these non-scrapbookers are all alike, they just don't get the importance of these things, loyalty and stickers, secrecy and photographs. The poor things, you actually feel sorry for your husband at this point, knowing this is an inadequacy he can never surmount.You watch as Lindsay leaves the room carrying your notebook. Kristin sadly shakes her head, as though sympathizing with you. You turn back to the Godfather as he says, "And you, Corvettecarey, you are my driver for the day, we will be off in a moment to CKU-Berlin. First, though, there are a few more details..."
When's the next installment?Edited to add: When's the next installment? LOL
"May you always have memories to scrap!" ~ Diana
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