So, it's over! The young man or woman, after spending several months of study and practice, has read from the Torah, chanted the haftorah, and delivered their d'var torah. They can now breathe a sigh of relief (and so can their parents!) that all the preparation that led them to this day is now behind them, and as the Bar Mitzvah boy will often say "Today I am a MAN!" In many congregations, it is customary to throw candy at the child when he or she has completed their portion of the service to wish a “sweet” life as the child makes the transition to adulthood. It is also typical to wish the child (and their parents!) "Mazel Tov" or congratulations.
The Bar or Bat Mitzvah ceremony itself is a religious service, however, it is customary to celebrate this milestone with a party or reception. Immediately following the religious service, the family often invites their family and friends, as well as all the members of the congregation in attendance, to a "Kiddish" or an "Oneg Shabbat". Both of these terms refer to a reception that is typically held in the synagogue and is similar to a luncheon. These receptions may range in size from very simple to quite elaborate depending on the family's means, traditions and cultural background. This reception honors the accomplishments of the newly minted Jewish adult and also helps to reinforce the community bonds.
Many families continue the celebration by hosting a party later that day for friends and family. Like the Kiddish or Oneg Shabbat, these celebrations can vary widely in scale and style. Some families opt for a simple gathering. Others may have parties that are geared more to the child's friends and may be held at amusement or party centers. Still others host extravagant parties with hundreds of guests. These more elaborate celebrations often include food, music, and dancing, creating a festive atmosphere that allows family and friends to come together.
Penn's Bar Mitzvah celebration will include an Kiddish at the synagogue following the service as well as a kid-centered party later that evening at an indoor amusement park (Laser Tag!!).
Okay Karyn - so I've been invited to a Bar Mitzvah. Now what?
1. What should I wear?
The dress code for a Bar or Bat Mitzvah typically depends on the synagogue and the family’s level of observance. Generally, it’s appropriate to dress respectfully and modestly. Women should wear modest clothing, such as a dress or skirt and top. Shoulders should be covered, and skirts should fall below the knee. Men usually will a wear a suit and tie, or at least dress pants and a collared shirt. If the service is in a more traditional synagogue, a kippah (yarmulke) may be required and, if so will be provided. Wearing a kippah is not a symbol of religious identification but is rather an act of respect to God and the sacredness of the worship space. Just as men and women may be asked to remove their hats in the church, or remove their shoes before entering a mosque, wearing a head covering is a non-denominational act of showing respect. It is also common for the kippah to be personalized for the occasion, sometimes featuring the date of the Bar Mitzvah or the boy’s name.
2. What kind of gifts are appropriate?
Gifts for a Bar Mitzvah should be thoughtful and appropriate for the occasion. Common gifts include monetary gifts. It is traditional to give gifts in multiples of 18 (e.g. 18, 36, 54, 72 etc.). This is because the Hebrew word for life, "chai" has a numeric value of 18. By giving a gift of "chai" the giver is symbolically blessing the recipient with a good, long life. Fun fact: If you've ever heard the Jewish toast "L'chaim" this comes from the word chai and is translated to mean "To life!"
3. How long does the service last
The length of a Bar Mitzvah service can vary, but it typically lasts between 1.5 and 3 hours, depending on the synagogue. Because of this, non-Jews are often surprised to learn that it is socially acceptable to leave the service for a bathroom break or to take small children out to "stretch their legs".
4) Is there anything I shouldn’t do in the synagogue on Shabbat?
All guests and participants are expected to respect the sanctity of the prayer service and Shabbat by setting your cell phone to vibrate or turning it off. - this means no texting or surfing the web! Taking photographs in the synagogue is also strictly forbidden on Shabbat.
4. Will I understand anything?
At the Shabbat service, the prayers and Torah readings are all in Hebrew, but the prayer book has an English translation, so you can get an idea of what is being said. And the d'var Torah, will be given by the child in English! NOTE: Remember that Hebrew is written from right to left! Therefore, Hebrew prayer books will open from left to right - opposite of what you are accustomed to.
So, as we discussed, a Bar Mitzvah includes both a religious ceremony as well as a celebration afterwards that includes family and friends. So, our last challenge will be a layout about a party or celebration that includes at least family and may also include friends.
A note of explanation before my example (this may sound familiar to those who participated in the Hanukkah challenge). Although my family is Jewish, my husband had been raised Catholic and my 93-year-old mother-in-law celebrates Christmas. Every year we've gone to her home with the children - and now the grandchildren - to celebrate Christmas with Grandma. We celebrate it as a day of love and giving to be shared with family. Since we raised our children to be respectful of all beliefs, from a young age they understood the true meaning of Christmas to Christians.
This layout is of my DD and her 3 kids celebrating Christmas at my DMIL's house.
Now for the boring, but important stuff:
1) For this challenge, only layouts can be submitted
2) This challenge will be due at midnight on 3/31.
3) All layouts must be NEW. You may combine this challenge with one other monthly challenge that permits it, (as well as the team challenge and the bimonthly prompt challenge) but you may NOT submit the same layout for 2 different Bar Mitzvah challenges.
4) Only one submission, per person.
5) MOST IMPORTANT: I hope that you learned something and that you HAVE FUN!
