ACOT Message Board

 Okay here is what happened. On Monday my daughter's school put a show on for Vet's Day so I went to that. When I got there I had to go to the bathroom so I went into the bathroom. My daughter was there waiting in line to go with one of her classmates. She said hi to me and told me that she did not have to go potty but her teacher was making her before the show. I told her to just try so she wouldn't have to go during the show.I watched her go into the stall and she tried to go potty. She came out told me she didn't have to go washed her hands and went back to class. During the show (when another class was preforming about thirty mins into the show) my daughter had to go potty. But the teacher would not let her telling her that she told her to go before. So then my daughter gets her name on the board because she had to go potty during the show.

Arielle came home in tears because she got her name on the board (first time this year). She told me it was because she had to go during that show and she tired to tell her teacher that she tried but she didn't listen.

So I wrote the teacher a note that night in Arielle's homework book. Explaining to her that I was there in bathroom and I know that Arielle tried. My note was written at the bottom of one page and the top of the next.

When I got Arielle's homework book back tonight the second page of my note was ripped out of her homework book (you can see where it was ripped) and there was a note from the teacher. Explaining to me that she was going by what the other student had told her and that she had told Arielle to go potty and she did not go and so therefor she had to go during the show and if she had gone before she wouldn't have had to go. And that Arielle lied to her about trying to go potty. (The classmate went into the potty and Arielle was in the stall right next to her. I watched them both go in.)

Now mind you the second part of my note where I explained that I was there in the bathroom is gone. I know that it was there when Arielle left for school this morning.

And just because you tell a child (any person for that matter) to try and  go potty now, does not mean that they won't have to go thirty minutes later. And I am sorry but I can not go potty on damand, can you?

I am really angry that part of my note is missing, I asked Arielle about it and she said she didn't tear it out and that she put it on her teacher's desk first thing. (No one but the teacher touches them after that.)

Also Arielle told me that she saw her teacher walking from the princpals office with her homework book after recess. (She is the only one with this cover on her homework book)

So to sum up here... the teacher has said my child lied (she did not)
part of my note is missing explaining what happened and that my child did not lie.... and my child was not allowed to go to the bathroom when she had to.

I plan to go in tomorrow and talk to her teacher. I will tell her what happened in the bathroom and ask what happened to the other part of the note.
I am not predicting a good turn for this...
But I will let you know how it goes....
in the mean time, would you be mad?

:::::EDIT::::::::
Okay so I went to talk to the teacher this morning. (Principal was busy)
I asked her if I could talk to her for a few minutes. She very rudely says that is all I have is a minute. Then she starts very rudely going off on how she had told Arielle to go to the bathroom and this other student had said she did not. I then asked her what happened to the other part of my note. She says oh I have that I ripped it out because I started writting something else on that page and then decided I did not want to say that. So I nicely asked for it back. (She could have written that in her note) Then asked her why she didn't acknowledge that I was there in the bathroom in her note and that I saw Arielle go into the stall and try and go to the bathroom. She said because I asked Arielle if she went and she said no and I asked the other child and she said no. I told her but that doesn't mean she didn't tried. And if even she did or didn't try it doesn't mean that she won't have to go in a half and hour. You can't tell I child that they can't go to the bathroom that is not healthy. Then she says well I was going off of Arielle's bathroom bahavior from the past few months, she normally doesn't have to go potty thirty minutes after going. I then told her she didn't go but I know she tried. She kept telling me that this other child told her that my daughter didn't go. And when I called her on the fact again that I know my child went into the potty then she changes her story and says yea I asked Arielle if she sat on the potty and tried and she said no. Yea well I asked my child if the teacher asked her that and she said no she did not.

So I take this as the teacher is telling me that my daughter and myself are liars and that this classmate is right. Even though i was there and I know what happened. I am so mad I am sick.

I can't leave me child in this teacher's hands. I have an interview at another school this morning trying to get her into that one. I can't just talk to the principal and have her switched classes because this is a small school and their is only 1 second grade. So since she goes to private school I now have to find another private school for her to go to. UGH!! I am just afraid because this teacher treated me so rudely that she is now going to treat my daughter different.

Thanks all for the comments. It really helps to know you all are behind me. What would you do now? Would you be switching schools?

 I would be furious! And I'm glad you are going to talk to the teacher face-to-face. I bet her body language and facial expressions will tell a lot.

I'm amazed a teacher would take the word of another student over the mother. That's crazy.

Good luck tomorrow! I'd like to know how it turns out.

 Yes, I would be mad.  And I would be talking to the principal!

 Yes I would be. And I would definitely be going in to see what the teacher has to say face-to-face. Good luck!

 Oh yes, I would be mad.

 Good luck with your meeting.  I would be worried too.

Oh yeah, I would be mad!  I would definitely be talking to the teacher AND the principal.  Good luck.

Yes!  My mom would have raised he**.  Go get 'em, tiger! 

That is just crazy.  Good luck talking to the teacher.  I hope you have some success.

I would be furious!  She has NO right to not let your child go potty when she needs it. I would definitely go see her and if that doesn't work I would go to the principal! As for the letter being ripped out, I'd love to her explain that one!  Good luck!

 Of course I'd be mad! I would already have called the school once I saw that the note was ripped out. When you talk to this teacher...Please remind her of the health issues about not letting your DD go to the potty. I do hope this works out for the better and the teacher doesn't cause any problems for your daughter.

Yes, I'd be mad. I agree with everyone else. I also think her body language will tell you alot like Shannon said. Good luck today & let us know how it turns out.

 I would be upset and definitely go speak with the teacher. I hope it all turned out.

 I would ask for a conference with the principal and the teacher.  Since the teacher went to the principal with this issue, she should be involved in the converstion between the two of you.

 I would be livid and would request a meeting with the principal and the teacher. Is there a time today when your daughter has another class with another teacher (art, music, etc)? I would make sure I went in during that tiem so I could talk witht he teacher and the principal.

 Yes, I would be mad.  I understand that some kids use the bathroom excuse to get out of class for a few minutes.  But that doesn't mean that everyone should be punished and only allowed to use the bathroom when the teacher says so. 

I have told both my dd's that if they really need to go during class, to politely ask the teacher and if the teacher says no, walk out of the room and go to the bathroom.  If they got in trouble for this, I would be at the school throwing a fit.  So far this has never happened.

 yes, I would be angry too, and this definitely calls for a face-to-face with the teacher!  how old is your daughter?  when my son was in school I had a few teachers that had these God-like complexes and actually treated me like dirt.  Why I do not know.  But they tried toi make me feel like I was a bad parent if he forgot his lunch or missed a homework assignment!  Gee, I wonder what its like to be perfect like them   I hope when you have your meeting with this woman and explain to her that your daughter did not lie, she is a decent human being about it.  If not, don't back down, go to the principal!  Its early in the school year and you'll only have problems for the rest of the school year.  Your poor daughter will be tagged as a liar in this woman's eyes from this point on!  {{{{hugs}}}} and good luck

Oh definitley.  I would have the principal in on that meeting.  Because she's basically saying you're lying as well. 

 Heck yeah, I'd be mad. And I'd probably go straight to the principal too... but that's me!

 I remember when my DD was in grade school one of her friends got a SEVERE kidney infection.  It was because of "holding" it during school.  You must make them see that it is also a health issue and they will be held accountable if something like that happens.  There's no need to be like that...geez.....